Mother’s Day gifts

Before you go wracking your brain and scouring stores for the ideal Mother’s Day gift, you might want to consider what mothers really want. While the typical offerings may please some, it’s the extra special thought that goes a long way. And every mom is different, so the key is finding what the mom in your life values. Hint: It’s not flowers.

Here’s a list of five things that mothers want and need, and not just on Mother’s Day:

Sleep. Ask any mom and depending on the age(s) of her children, she can fill you in on her exact amount of sleep deprivation. Lack of sleep often starts somewhere in pregnancy and it ends — well, I don’t know when it ends, or if it actually does. I am still sleep-deprived and all my kids have been out of diapers for years.

NOT flowers. I recently read somewhere (can’t remember where — see #1) that moms do not want flowers for Mother’s Day. The article said it was a useless gift, often a last-minute thought, and an easy purchase to fulfill the obligation of even getting a gift. So unless the mom in your life really, really loves flowers, I’d skip this one. And shout-out to hubby, my allergies are horrendous, so please pay careful attention to this suggestion.

Something unique. Meaning something that says mom, and your particular wife, girlfriend, partner, or mother — not what is mass-marketed to stores for the droves of women who are mothers. Sure, an over-the-top frilly pink hat or the newest kitchen gadget might satisfy a lot of moms, but it would honestly tick me off. It’s just not me. And every mom wants something that says you know her, you get her taste, you understand her likes and dislikes, and didn’t merely settle for a gift at a stand in the mall. For me, a live Dave Matthews Band CD that I don’t already have, a new computer gadget, or a great book would do just fine.

Jewelry almost always works. But again, know her taste. Does she like silver, gold, or white gold? Does she prefer earrings or a necklace? Try combining a remembrance of her child, in the form of a locket or charm, in the piece of jewelry. There is nothing sweeter than being given a symbol of your baby that you can keep with you and wear.

Words. OK, this might seem too easy, but really it can be more meaningful than you may think. Every mom likes to hear and needs to know that you think she is doing a good job, appreciate everything she does day in and day out, and value her as a partner and a mother. You can write it in a letter or a card. If you are creative, you can pen a poem. You can simply just say it in a well-planned out time and place (think nice dinner that she didn’t have to cook over a bottle of wine).

Being a mother is a gift in itself, but nothing feels better than having the person in your life that you love the most celebrate your unique life as a mom.

Danielle Sullivan, a mom of three, has worked as a writer and editor in the parenting world for more than 10 years. Sullivan also writes about pets and parenting for Disney’s Babble.com. Find Sullivan on her blogs, Just Write Mom and Some Puppy To Love.